Links Every park and recreation manager wishes his or her agency could be staffed exclusively with highly motivated, enthusiastic individuals who have flawless personalities.
Psychologists suggest that we are driven by two connected motivations: Most of us devote more energy to the latter than the former. Instead of being proactive and making choices for our happiness, we react to things that happen in our lives and fight or flee to minimize our pain.
Instead of deciding to end an unhealthy relationship and open up to a better one, we may stay and either avoid confrontation or initiate one to feel a sense of control. Instead of leaving a horrible job to find one we love, we may stay and complain about it all the time, trying to minimize the pain of accepting the situation as real—and enduring until we change it.
From a very young age, I felt overwhelmed by pain. As a pre-teen, I ate my feelings. As a teen, I starved them away. In college, I drank and smoked them numb.
And in my twenties, I felt and cried my eyes red and raw.
I shook and convulsed. After ten minutes of twisting, banging, and fighting, I finally threw it at a wall and broke down. You may think that was a sure sign I had emotional problems and assume there was some pill to help anesthetize that sadness.
But the reality was a lot simpler: As unpleasant as it may sound, I needed to learn how to feel bad, but first I needed to understand why I felt bad so often. Developing emotional intelligence Learning to sit with negative feelings Creating situations for positive feelings Emotional Intelligence Researchers originated this idea as the missing link in terms of success and effectiveness in life.
If you have a high EIQ, you likely regulate your emotions well; handle uncertainties and difficulties without excessive panic, stress, and fear; and avoid overreacting to situations before knowing the full details.
Or in other words, you may feel bad far more often than you feel good. Understand what emotional intelligence looks like.
Psychologist Daniel Goleman identified five elements to EI: Use meditation to regulate emotions. Take an honest look at your reactions. Do you frequently jump to conclusions without knowing all the facts?
Do you assume you know what other people feel and take responsibility for that? Do you freak out over stressful situations, blaming other people, getting hard on yourself, and panicking over possible consequences?
Practice observing your feelings and taking responsibility for them. Instead, try to pinpoint exactly what you feel—scared, frustrated, worried, ashamed, agitated, angry—and then pinpoint what might be the cause.
Simply find the cause and effect, i. Once you know what you feel, you can now challenge both the cause and the effect.
And then you can accept that there is an alternative—you can choose to interpret the situation a different way, soothe yourself, and then feel something different. No one else causes our feelings. Only we can choose and change them. Learn to Sit with Negative Feelings Even if you reframe a situation to see things differently, there will be times when you still feel something that seems negative.
While not every situation requires panic, sometimes our feelings are appropriate for the events going on in our lives. We are allowed to feel whatever we need to feel.While it's true that each of us enters this world with certain innate characteristics and personality types, the majority of our behaviors are learned through our interactions with others.
Through trial-and-error, we exhibit a variety of behaviors that others around us either reward or punish. As our analysis unfolds it will become apparent that the social influence of emotion can vary in terms of the emotions evoked in others (similar emotions, different emotions that complement agent emotions or different emotions that respond to inferences drawn from agent emotion or agent situation).
Aug 05, · The purpose of this section is to give you an introduction to principles of motivation and emotion. Motivational theories explain the "itch" or "drive" or "reason" behind our behaviors - voluntary and involuntary. which indicates that we do evaluate our physiological states when interpreting our emotions.
A contract of norms and behaviors can help define the classroom community as a socially and emotionally safe place. Students should participate in shaping the contract, identifying a list of agreements about how class members will treat one another, talk together and so on.
Studies show that when we're dissatisfied with certain products, We are equally avoidant when it comes to complaints to our loved ones.
We fear voicing them will only lead to an argument and.
"Some behaviors are clearly unethical—fraud is an extreme example," Crawford writes, "but many are less clear and occur in complex situations. Ethical Dilemmas. Posted By Chris Dimick on Apr 2, If managers feel confident in portraying a culture of honesty and integrity and can feel certain that it is the first priority of their.